An area humanist was so distraught today by the brutal attack by Phil Drake on a young puppy that he has branded all men called Phil as puppy killers and called for a cull on Phils.
He said "is it a coincidence that this man is called Phil and that he killed a puppy? Beware! All of you! There may be a Phil in your street, village or town. If one Phil can do this to one puppy, imagine was ten, a hundred, a thousand or even a hundred thousand Phils could do to even more puppies".
In other news; Philadelphia has delcared itself the 'Puppy Loving City' where puppies are as safe as houses.
